May
18
2009

Sumbitch

A filthy rich Florida man decided that he wanted to throw a party and
invited all of his buddies and neighbors.
He also invited Leroy, the only Redneck in the neighborhood. He held
The party around the pool in the backyard of his mansion.
Leroy was having a good time drinking, dancing, eating shrimp,
Oysters and BBQ and flirting with all the women.
At the height of the party, the host said, ‘I have a 10 foot
man-eating gator in my pool and I’ll give a million dollars to anyone who
has
the nerve to jump in.’

The words were barely out of his mouth when there was a loud splash.
Everyone turned around and saw Leroy in the pool!
Leroy was fighting the gator and kicking its ass! Leroy was jabbing
it in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, head butts and choke
holds, biting the gator on the tail and flipping it through the air like
some kind of Judo Instructor.

The water was churning and splashing everywhere. Both Leroy and the
Gator were screaming and raising hell.

Finally Leroy strangled the gator and let it float to the top like a
dime store goldfish.

Leroy then slowly climbed out of the pool. Everybody was just staring
At him in disbelief.

Finally the host says, ‘Well, Leroy, I reckon I owe you a million
dollars.’

No, that’s okay. I don’t want it,’ said Leroy.

The rich man said, ‘Man, I have to give you something. You won the
bet. How about half a million bucks then?’

No thanks, I don’t want it,’ answered Leroy.

The host said, ‘Come on, I insist on giving you something.. That was
amazing. How about a new Porsche and a Rolex and some stock
options?’

Again Leroy said no.

Confused, the rich man asked, ‘Well, Leroy, then what do you want?’

Leroy said, ‘I want the name of the Sumbitch who pushed me in the
pool!

Posted by Nobody - May 18, 2009 at 8:25 am in: Random Bullshit |

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