Oct
31
2008
1

In case you were wondering.

In case you were wondering.

Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10 each.

The villagers seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest, and started catching them.

The man bought thousands at $10 and as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He further announced that he would now buy at $20.

This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again.

Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their farms.

The offer increased to $25 each and the supply of monkeys became so little that it was an effort to effort to even see a monkey, let alone catch it!

The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at $50!

However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now buy on his behalf.

In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers. ‘Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has collected. I will sell them to you at $35 and when the man returns from the city, you can sell them to him for $50 each.’

The villagers rounded up all their savings and bought all the monkeys.

Then they never saw the man nor his assistant ever again, only monkeys everywhere!

And now, people, you have a better understanding of how the stock market works.

Posted by Nobody - October 31, 2008 at 3:49 pm in: Random Bullshit | Tags:
Oct
31
2008
3

New tattoo

A blonde is showing off her new tattoo of a giant
seashell on her inner thigh.

Her friends ask her why she would get such a tattoo
and why in that location.

She responded, “It’s really cool. If you put
your ear up against the tattoo,
you can smell the ocean.”

Posted by Nobody - October 31, 2008 at 9:27 am in: Uncategorized |
Oct
28
2008
0

NObama ‘08

Posted by Nobody - October 28, 2008 at 8:26 am in: Election, NObama |
Oct
24
2008
3

Because his head is up his ass.

Posted by Nobody - October 24, 2008 at 11:28 am in: Election, NObama |
Oct
22
2008
0

What?

You need to a flashplayer enabled browser to view this YouTube video

I’m not sure what the fuck he’s talkin about.

Posted by Nobody - October 22, 2008 at 7:43 pm in: Election, NObama, Politicians |
Oct
22
2008
1

Trick or Treat

Posted by Nobody - October 22, 2008 at 8:58 am in: Random Bullshit | Tags: ,
Oct
20
2008
0

Posted by Nobody - October 20, 2008 at 9:18 pm in: Uncategorized |
Oct
20
2008
3

First and Second Amendements

Posted by Nobody - October 20, 2008 at 11:48 am in: Election |
Oct
14
2008
0

Approval Rating of Congress

From an Australian political cartoon.

Posted by Nobody - October 14, 2008 at 11:37 am in: Politicians |
Oct
14
2008
3

A Cowboy Story

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in California when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.
The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, ‘If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?’
Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, ‘Sure, Why not?’
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, ‘You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.’
‘That’s right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,’ says Bud.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then the Bud says to the young man, ‘Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?’
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, ‘Okay, why not?’
‘You’re a Congressman for the U.S. Government’, says Bud.
‘Wow! That’s correct,’ says the yuppie, ‘but how did you guess that?’
‘No guessing required.’ answered the cowboy. ‘You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don’t know a thing about cows…this is a herd of sheep. .
Now give me back my dog.
Posted by Nobody - October 14, 2008 at 9:46 am in: Politicians, Random Bullshit |

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